RN Volunteer Band HMS Collingwood

BdCSgt Paul Johnson BMus(Hons) ARCM(Hons) CTABRSM RM

How time flies! Were it not for the pressing deadline for this article it would not seem possible that the four months has passed since I last committed to print the Band’s exploits. The last four months have been particularly eventful for the Band, not least because, since our last article we are able to reflect upon perhaps our most successful Volunteer Band Festival to date.

Alas with the Festival some months behind us and the results and prize giving ceremony covered extensively in the last Blue Band edition, I do not intend to dwell too much on the Festival itself. It would, however, be remiss of me not to take this opportunity to personally reflect upon the Band’s tremendous performance and their subsequent success. Without exception, all who represented HMS Collingwood put in a performance to be thoroughly proud of, leaving their very best to when it counted most; on the day and for the competition. Fortunately this outstanding effort was enough to edge the judges' decision in all but one of the tightly contested categories in which we competed. None of this, of course, would have been possible without the help of a whole raft of affiliates and supporters including amongst others, Cpl Bug Jim Christopher and Bug II Jo Nelson, whose sterling work with the Corps of Drums proved invaluable. With a total haul of seven cups I think all those concerned should feel justifiably proud of their achievements. Well done all, you have made a ‘stick holding’ bandy very proud.

With our newly acquired spoils safely deposited in the trophy cabinet and the extended celebrations behind us, it was back to business as usual and attending to the ‘bread and butter’ engagements that is the mainstay of the Band. HMS Collingwood is the largest training establishment in the Royal Navy and consequently houses both a very well supported Ward Room and Warrant Officers and Senior Rates' Mess. Each mess enjoys a very active social calendar providing plenty of opportunity for the Band to perform throughout the year. With both messes equally supportive of the Band and offering near perfect band facilities for mess functions these engagements remain an enjoyable backdrop for the Band’s members, as well as providing a regular focus of the Band’s weekly rehearsals.

Of all the mess functions undertaken by the Band, the biggest and most high profile is that of the First Sea Lord's Conference. Hosted by HMS Collingwood each year, this is an annual fixture in our calendar that is usually scheduled in June with the Band normally tasked to perform a pre-dinner beat retreat. This year however, the conference and culminating dinner had been rescheduled and moved to 1 October. With the dark nights drawing in and a beat retreat off the cards, it was decided our efforts would be best framed by a pre-dinner mess beatings ably lead by Mr Neil Anstee followed by a ‘cocktail pianist’ in the shape of Mr Lyndon Ford to be followed by an extra, featuring, under some duress, ‘yours truly.’ Following a request from the XO it was hoped that the Band could perform ‘that frogman sketch that featured the tuba’. For those not familiar with this musical ‘gem’ the piece of music is called Forty Fathoms and in the mess environment involves playing said instrument extremely loud in the vicinity of the ears of as many of the diners as possible. Given that the performer is traditionally dressed in the full regalia of a diver, complete with flippers, this is easier said than done. For the uninitiated, flippers, while essential to the overall comedic effect, are not recommended footwear when trying to negotiate the limited space between the seats of tightly packed diners, particularly when the wearer is also attempting choreography while brandishing and attempting to ‘play’ the tuba. My partner in crime for the extra was BdCSgt Steve ‘Rasher’ Bacon who dusted off his baton to resume the role of conductor for the occasion. Suffice to say, the whole experience was eventful, if not musical. More importantly, no diners were harmed during the performance.

With October upon us it was time, once again, to dust off and polish the Band’s marching gear for the annual pilgrimage to Titchfield and Littlehampton where the Band participates in their respective town’s carnivals and torchlight processions. As these are evening engagements it is carrots all round with good eyesight a must. Conveniently squeezed in between the obligatory round of Trafalgar Night mess functions these engagements allow the Band a welcome opportunity to stretch their legs in what is, for the Band, a very busy month.

With the usual round of Trafalgar Night celebrations behind us and the obligatory sea shanties a distant echo it was time to turn our thoughts and attention to our most recent engagement, November’s annual Remembrance Parade held in Fareham. This service is fully supported by HMS Collingwood, with the Commodore in attendance, as well as a full guard and band. This setting provided us with a suitable moment to reflect upon the past and the future in the shape of two of our youngest members. Playing with the Band for the first time and for their first parade, we welcome to our ranks AB Rachel Woolly who joins us from Phase II training and Mr Tom Sellen who join us and HMS Collingwood Sea Cadet Corps.

Collingwood Volunteer Band at the Littlehampton parade

Also on parade, though not for the first time, was our new Band Officer, Lt Rachel Smallwood. Formerly Musician Smallwood, Rachel has led a varied military career that has taken her from the ranks of the Royal Marines Band Service to the Army Officer Corps before gravitating back to the Royal Navy as an education officer. Welcome back into the fold Rachel and I hope you enjoy your time with the Band.

Before I sign off for this edition I think it only fitting that I take this opportunity to bid a fond farewell to one of the Band's biggest supporters. I refer to HMS Collingwood’s Executive Officer and Ward Room Mess President, Commander Alun Watts RN, who is shortly to leave us to take up a new post in Northwood Headquarters. On behalf of myself and the Band I would like to thank you publically for all your support and wish you every success in your new post.

So with Christmas decorations aplenty in the high street and the requests for carol concerts mounting up in the dairy I would like to sign off wishing all our readers a very early festive farewell.

Last updated 15 April 2010